Twas the night before school started...

We wanted to have a fun night in anticipation of the first day tomorrow.

We started with homemade pizza the minute Jordan walked in the door.

Then we moved on to a bike ride.

Seriously...this is what we require for a simple family ride...

we take up way more than our share of the road.

Then we came home and started getting things ready...

All the bags are packed.

And we made sure everyone had their new shoes ready to go.

(I was kind of jealous of the girls' new converses...they are way more hip than their mother.)

Then quickly remembered Avery still needed some shoe lace tying practice.

She has it mastered now!

Next it was baths for all...and fingernail painting for the girls...

while the boys watched 'Wipeout'!

Serious cuteness.

After the big kids were tucked in bed Little Miss Crazy Hair

showed Daddy that she knows how to clap now!

And so I think we are ready for the big day.

Lots of excitement and squealing in the house tonight.

I pray that they are always this excited for the first day.

therapy

Well my sadness is setting in on our last day of summer.

To help it I am looking at pictures of complete adorableness.

Jordan loves babies...

And I love all those blue eyes.

And Tess...well she just loves Adele!

Yep, adorable.

It is almost here...

School starts Wednesday.

Sully has the days counted down.

Honestly, I am ready for school to start.

Really, I am.

I will cry when they go...but if they stay I might cry too.

But letting Sully go is going to be rough.

My only boy.

I have this fear that my days of holding him and smelling him and touching him are going to come to an end. Jordan tries to tell me it wont happen...that Im a hugger and all my relationships involve hugging...but I know things will be different as he ages.

So today when he said, 'mommy, can I snuggle with you?'...I about cried in excitement.

And we cuddled up like this.

I was truly asleep...Sully was faking.

But Lauren caught the moment.

And I wont forget it...that my 'almost kindergartener' wanted to spend part of his last week at home cuddling with his mom...ugh...this one's gonna hurt a whole lot...just like the two before him.

encouragement

God always knows when I am feeling overwhelmed and ill-equipped. And He sends me some encouragement.

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen, since what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

My outlook and my whole day changes when I stop focusing on the moment and start focusing on eternity. We serve an awesome God.

my littlest

I'm thinking I'm going to have a pretty fun year with these two little girls!

Focusing on little girl things and not running around so much like we do for the big kids right now. Im really getting excited for it.

She loves to have me read to her right now and do puzzles. I love that.

SO sweet.

She has lots of serious looks.

But her smiles are simply the best!

I cant imagine anything much cuter!

Science Center

Im trying to squeeze all the fun I can into these last days before school starts.

So the kids and I headed to the Science Center today.

We ran into 2 problems:

1. It turns out we've been there too many times...they went through the exhibits way too fast

2. I took too many kids along to actually participate in any of the exhibits!

We had a good time but I'm not quite sure it was worth the drive this time and I was completely exhausted when we got home.

Bubble fun!

They are so sweet together...and their eyes!

adventures and mishaps

As one would imagine not all of the adventures we take on with our kids are smooth sailing.

Anything with 5 young kids involved is bound to have hairy moments.

Tonight's was one of those nights when more things went wrong than right...but we all ended the night smiling and laughing and the kids were full of thank you's and 'that was fun!' so I'll still call it a success.

We headed to George Wyth State Park for some bike riding on their awesome trails.

The plan was to bike to the middle of the park, play at the playground there and then bike back.

This was one of Sully's first 'real' bike rides...

We were out maybe 3 minutes and we came to the first hill ... going down.

Sully panicked a bit...and I did too. His hand brakes were not working right and he fell.

He thankfully was just scared and not hurt. I about killed myself jumping off my bike to run to him but we'll not focus on that.

The family following us was not so lucky...their little boy got distracted by us and wiped out big time...lots and lots of blood, missing skin and I'm gonna have to bet a few missing teeth.

Ugh.

So then we trudge on and Sully is really falling behind.

So Jordan and I are taking turns staying with him or riding up with the big girls.

Then suddenly Jordan and all the girls were just gone.

And Sully and I came to a fork in the road.

I havent been on these trails in like 4 years...I had no idea where to go.

We chose wrong.

Long story short we didn't see Jordan and the girls again for well over an hour.

I think I said the words, 'pedal faster & stay to the right' at least 127 times each.

Geesch!!

Sullivan was a real trooper and he didn't complain once!

And he was adorable.

At one point he said,

'well at least if we are lost I get to have a date with you! I cant wait to tell Daddy!'

Seriously, could he be sweeter?

Eventually we all met back up and shared our adventures.

My boy...he's the best.

Jordan and his girls...as you can see, Torrance was simply thrilled by it all.

yep, precious.

Go Hawkeyes?!

Lauren and Avery are headed to Brooklyn's birthday party soon.

Its a Hawkeye party.

(Avery almost refused to dress up - both Brooklyn and Avery's dads have done a good job of brain washing their girls about the Hawkeyes and Cyclones...they just brainwashed for opposite teams.)

Tess insisted on dressing like them...

This picture is nothing but a testament to our love for Brooklyn!

Sullivan revolted against all this and showed our family's true colors!

9 months old!

Torrance turned 9 months old a couple of weeks ago...

hard to believe.

At 9 months she is ON THE GO!

She crawls like a mad woman, stands to everything, is starting to 'cruise', climbs on top of whatever she can and chases her siblings everywhere.

She points the remotes at the tv...how does she know how to do that?

She scratches and bites. ugh and ow.

Just tonight she started hiding her face from me and playing peek-a-boo.

She is ....um... well Jordan thinks she might have 'baby ADD'...the child CAN.NOT sit still.

She is giving up the bottle...because it takes too long to drink.

She loves to eat...and is giving up baby food...she wants to eat right off our plates.

She favors me but when it gets close to bedtime she refuses to come to me and clings to Jordan...knowing I'm about to put her to bed! smart girl.

She is a joy and makes us laugh all the time.

We love you Tori.

And you are crazy beautiful.

She weighed in at her appointment today at 18 lbs 5 ou.

& measures 27 3/4 inches.

A little more than 50% for both.

Which funny enough...is almost EXACTLY the same as Tess at this age...she's just a bit taller.

Which makes her quite a bit smaller than Lauren & Sully were at this age but quite a bit larger than Avery was at this age.

Really, no more growing up...this is it...okay?

splittin' up

A day of fun for everyone today...

This one gets to head off with Papa and Aaron to the zoo, mini golf and the I-Cubs!

These four get to go school shopping with mom & dad.

And believe it or not...they are just as excited as he is!

how to get your kids to sleep in...

a. have your husband take the day off

b. head 2 hours north

c. kayak in the beautiful sun for 4 hours

d. take them hiking

e. take them to a playground and stay till after dark

f. drive 2 hours home while watching movies

g. arrive home at 11:45 and give all baths

This should ensure that everyone sleeps until 10 or after.

Worked for us!!!

(technically I was up...but that's because I CANT SLEEP IN!)

its official

It only took 9.5 years but its official....I'm a mom.

I just said, 'Listen to what I MEAN! NOT what I say.'

And they officially are laughing at me.

evidence of FUN!

Love her in all baby-ness

Love her in all her goofy grown-up-ness!

Love her in all her sweet 3 year old sassiness!

Love her in all her cuddly, question-filled, loveliness!

Love him in all his goofy, weird grin, silliness!

the countdown

(Beware...ranting here...but also includes adorable pictures of someone in a pink swimsuit and pink cowgirl boots...and encouragement at the end!)

The big countdown is on.

School starts in less than 3 weeks.

The kids are getting excited. And they are fighting more. And driving me rather crazy. So I know we are getting close.

Im excited.

And I'm dreading it.

Like most parts of them growing up.

Its been a good summer. But there are a lot of things I wish we'd done that we didn't. I meant to have more one on one time with each of the older kids. I didnt. That's hard to do with a baby.

I felt like I said to myself, 'next year will be an easier summer'...a lot. And I hate that. I hate living for 'next year'. I want to live for now. And while we did that a lot...I didnt enough.

I said, no a lot this summer. No, we cant do that, the baby is napping. No, we cant do that because I cant take all of you AND the baby to do that without daddy with us and he's at work.

No, no, no.

I hate that. Hate saying no.

I want to be FUN!

One day Avery said, 'sometimes I wish that we didnt have so many kids in our family so I could just have more time with you.' She didnt say it snotty, just stating the fact of how she was feeling.

And what I heard was, 'Wow, EPIC fail mom. EPIC FAIL!

And I know she doesn't really mean she doesnt want her siblings...I know that by the smiles and laughter I hear pouring out of her as they play together. I know by watching the bond between her and Lauren and the similarities between her and Contessa. And I know, I know that eventually she will be happy she has a big family to surround her with love and support for the rest of her days. I know that...because I have been in her place. But I also want to give her so much more of myself than I can give right now.

Having a five kids is a lot. I love it. But I feel torn 5 different directions at almost every point of the day. And those are just the directions of the kids...not to mention my job, my house, my friends, my extended family, my HUSBAND!

And Satan really likes to attack me when I feel overwhelmed and like a failure. He can play the 'yes, you are a big fat failure' card at just the right moments! He's a clever one.

And Im really not complaining. I just want to remember. To remember that this summer was wonderful just like it shows in all our pictures. We've had awesome times and made great memories. But this summer with a 9, 7, 5, 3 and baby was also exhausting...and made me feel rather inadequate at many points.

What I love is how my kids seem to possess some magical ability to forgive me. It seems that with each new sunrise they have forgotten my failures the day before...they are not nearly as hard on me as I am on myself.

And even better than that...God's mercies are new each morning. When I fail He doesn't want me to wallow in it. He wants me to start the new day renewed in his strength. Raising my kids with all my power and patience and love as a glory to Him.

These verses give me strength and hope for tomorrow and not just that...but for TODAY!

Lamentations 3:22-23 'The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, His mercies never come to an end, they are new every morning, great is your faithfulness.

Exodus 15:2 'The Lord is my strength and my song, and He has become my salvation, this is my God, and I will praise Him, my father's God, and I will exalt Him.

Psalm 21:13 'Be exalted, O Lord, in your strength! We will sing and praise your power.'

Psalm 28:7 'The Lord is my strength and my shield; in Him my heart trusts, and I am helped, my heart exalts, and with my song I give thanks to Him.'

Psalm 59:16 'But I will sing of your strength, I will sing aloud of your steadfast love in the morning. For you have been to me a fortress and a refuse in the day of my distress.'

sorting

one of the hardest things for me to keep on top of with 5 kids is their clothes...and I dont even mean cleaning them.

it seems that I always need to clean out their drawers and closets because they are always out growing things.

with the start of school drawing near I kind of had a little freak out today and gutted the girls bedroom. I came out with two garbage bags of garbage. scraps of paper, wrappers, sunday school flyers, notes, broken toys, pen caps, feathers, rocks, one entire bag of unwrapped and partially eaten candy, old makeup, junky parade paraphernalia. The list of garbage could go on and on. And this did not include any of the 'treasures' that they kept that didn't really fall into the 'garbage pile' but definetly did not belong in the 'keep pile'.

I was exhausted before I even got to their clothes.

when I finished with their clothes I was sad to discover that Lauren will have to have an almost all new fall wardrobe. I should feel grateful that last year she was able to wear many things from the previous year but this year we are not so lucky.

after their room I moved onto Sully and Tess's. I discovered Sullivan is in the same boat as Lauren. ugh.

It does feel good to have that job complete and it felt really good to go down to the basement and open tubs to find literally piles of clothes for Avery, Tess and Torrance...but honestly, its my least favorite job. I should do a little each month...instead of waiting till fall and spring. Maybe this year I'll do that...of course I have said that every single year....

ask a silly question...

I said, 'Tess, what do you think we should do tonight?'

She answered, 'Well, I want to go to Christmas and see Halloween. Then go to Cinny's house and then Baub's house and have my party again and then come home and go to sleep.'

(she never calls her grandmas 'grandma' she calls them just by their first names only and she pronounces them Cinnyand Baub...I dont want to forget that.)

I really wasn't expecting an answer from her. I will know better next time.

She has very specific ideas on what she wants to do these days...I should have known.

And I cant blame her...she chose to celebrate two holidays, visit both her grandmas, have a birthday party and then go to sleep. If I had to choose I think I'd pick those things too!

Love her.

my summer love

I'm sure it comes as no surprise that its really sad to me that she is my last baby to see in a tiny swimsuit and hat. I think I might have taken like 75 pictures of her in this today. There's nothing like a baby girl all dressed up!

nine months old!

Someone turned 9 months old today!

Sullivan wanted to throw her a party. We really should!

At 9 months Torrance is really just fun!

I think she is such a happy easy baby because she is constantly entertained!

She is going to be a sad baby when school starts.

She loves food...eating 3 meals per day plus snacks.

She is eating more table food and seems to want just about everything she sees us eating.

She is a great sleeper - going to bed about 8 and getting up about 7:30.

She continues to take 2 naps per day - am being about an hour or so and pm being about 2.5 hours. I'm ready for it to drop to one but she is not.

She is into EVERYTHING. Climbs on everything and stands to everything!

She also thinks she can let go. But she cant...and she's taken some nasty falls this week.

We need to get some balance!

She loves her siblings and is starting to become quite a little ham.

I can see her 'youngest child' spot being a good fit for her...she just loves to have them laugh at her.

Her latest trick is to 'slap' herself in the mouth with her hand or forearm and make noise.

She finds it very funny. She also loves to blow raspberries. Especially while eating. I do not love that. Messy!

She sucks her fingers and especially her thumb.

She's adorable!

And her eyes are so blue.

She gets really excited to see Jordan when he comes home each night and lights up for him.

But she is my first honest to goodness mommy's girl.

Don't think I'm not enjoying that!

She officially has 4 teeth and I can see 2 more working in.

check out the fang!

She's easy going and funny.

Not a cuddler though...too busy.

Tori we love you sweetie. What did we do before you were with us?

Happy 9 months!

so hard to believe!

thankful thursday. laundry edition

its thankful thursday so i just have to say;

that i can choose to see that pile of laundry in the previous post as a huge burden.

or i can choose to see it as a big, huge pile of a blessing.

it represents that im a mom many times over. blessed.

it represents that we have seemingly limitless amounts of clothes. blessed.

it represents that i am well off enough that i have time to be stressed by laundry. blessed.

and im well off enough to own laundry baskets! blessed.

it represents that we get to go swimming...a lot apparently from all the swim suits and swim towels. blessed.

it reminds me that i am home to tackle this and not thinking about it while sitting at work. blessed.

it is a great big pile of blessings.

seriously.

what burden can you choose to turn into a blessing today? ask Him to show it to you.

Deuteronomy 28:2 'And all these blessings shall come on thee, and overtake thee, if thou shalt hearken unto the voice of the Lord they God.'

Fold me.

The scary part?

That's not all of it.