Five

Tonight after giving baths I realized that now we have five little wash cloths hanging in the tub at the end of the night.

Five.

We have five kids.

You'd think I'd already realize that but at times it hits me.

And tonight I'm struck by how many that really is!

And the responsibility before us. With great blessing comes great responsibility.

I'm not feeling all that worthy to take on that responsibility. I feel more like I'm going to mess it up in a real big way. Very inadequate and having no clue even where to start raising these five for Him. Knowing that the characteristics they are seeing in me are not the ones I want to see in them. Knowing that mixed in with my happiness and elation are my weakness and exhaustion and short temper and my tendency to feel like I may hyperventilate.

But then I remembered this promise...'If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.' James 1:5

So I'm still hyperventilating a little bit. But I've got my paper bag in place to breathe into now.

And I'm off to pray for Jordan and I and for our five.

yep, five.